Beetlejuice
System: NES
Release Date: May 1991
Developer: Rare
Publisher: LJN
Genre: Action
The ghost with the most is on NES in Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! The titular deceased wants to kick the Deetzes out of his charming old home. In order to do this, he’s going to have to collect hundreds if not thousands of help vouchers and buy some scares to get past the obstacles in his way. Do you have what it takes to get through five levels? Because I don’t think most people ever will.
There are two different modes of play. The first is a typical side scrolling action platformer. Beetlejuice jumps with the A Button and stomps with the B Button. The manual says to stomp on beetles in order to earn Help Vouchers. You pretty immediately come across a giant beetle looking creature and when you try to stomp it, you get hurt! I tried this a few times before getting angry and moving on. I platformed my way into a house where I had to time my way across obstacles to make it to the next screen. This is when I found the beetles that are stompable. These are tiny things that jump out of holes in the ground.
Grind for help vouchers all you want, because you’ll want them in order to buy scares. There are some shops that sell a few different power ups that you can activate for a short period of time. They’re necessary in order to defeat bosses at the end of the level, but the first level requires you to use the skeleton scare to destroy a bee’s nest and make a cloud move. The holes that beetles jump out of are little rooms that have enemies inside them that require precise jumps to kill.
Level three takes you into the Deetz home and is a top down view. This level angered me greatly. You have to walk around avoiding enemies that move as quickly as you, but are perfect in their angles. Even if you can avoid them, you’re often required to use a very limited amount of imprecise scares to kill them in order to move forward. It’s honestly one of the most frustrating levels I think I’ve ever played. If I didn’t have the ability to time travel, I would have quit right here. You have to find items to give to NPCs who are blocking your path. If you can avoid the enemies, you also have to dodge a door that takes you to a punishment level. I don’t know what else to say.
If you get by this level, you have a couple more platforming levels and a mercifully short top down level. Making it to the end is super anticlimactic. When you make it to the end of Hell’s waiting room there’s an exit door and then it’s game over. Thank God.
Graphics: 2.0
Everything looks average across the board, but I can’t give any props for what I see.
Sound: 1.5
Music is serviceable, but boring.
Gameplay: 1.0
If you leave the screen before it can adjust, you die. This is horrible design.
Difficulty: 0.5
You’re going to die over and over and hate every second of it, because you have a limited number of lives and continues.
Fun Factor: 0.5
This is an extremely unfun game.
Overall Rating: 1.1
Beetlejuice earns a D. I suggest you stay away from playing this game. It sucks. I have nothing good to say about it.